I was looking through someone else’s blog this morning before church and came across one lady’s explanation as to why she wouldn’t be going to church this Easter, like most people do. Turns out she and her kids used to be a church going family, but got stung a few times by different churches. Here are some excerpts from her post.
I haven’t been to church in over a year. We were very active, at least we were trying to be active in our church for years. Seems that hypocrites live everywhere as well as gossips.
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Cliques do not belong in a church, yet they do exist.
Money is frequently asked for.
Gossip exists no matter how good a “Christian” you pretend to be.
People always ask the same people to do the same things. If you try to help, you are told thanks, but no thanks.
People in a church try to understand what you are going through, when you are military, but they never really get it.
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We did go to another church in town for Christmas, but it didn’t last long as I could not sit or stand for any length of time physically. I haven’t been inside a church since January of last year and I have no desire to do so. Greg doesn’t miss it as I have asked him if I made him stop going or wanting to go. He told me that he saw it as a chore and didn’t really think he was getting anything out of it.
I guess if you see things as a chore, or just something you do because you HAVE to, you no longer want to.
She even recounts a story about how she waited in the church parking lot for her daughter to return from a youth trip for over an hour w/o being told that the trip was running behind schedule.
I think that the Church as a whole is forgetting to serve God and the people instead of serving itself (does that make sense?) I think sometimes the health of the church is places ahead of the spiritual health of it’s flock and people get lost in the corners. And yes, the church is made up of imperfect people. People sin, and it’s not good. But it’s really a sad fact that there are tons of people who are frustrated by church because of hypocrites…but we are all hypocrites to a degree.
Anyway, here’s the entire post (there are 3 pages to it) with some salty, but honest language if you choose to read it: The Post
Check out the comments as well.
In the church I "belong to" there are things I do like and others I don't; I try to focus on the ones I like. I feel my relationship with God doesn't depend on but may be enriched by attending a church with which I am mostly comfortable.
thanks for posting a link to the other blog. i found her post and have tried to comment to it. my first attempt was pretty sticky, i suppose, apoligizing for the way she's been treated but asking for mercy and forgiveness in seeking out another fellowship. that post didn't show up, so i tried again, this time, mostly apologizing that "christians" treated her that way, and for christians not giving her hope/reason to try again. that comment wasn't there either, and a third one was posted – i "verified" it before leaving for work, but it wasn't there when i got to the office……… i should be offended (maybe i am) that my posts weren't given consideration (an email was unanswered, too). not going to try anymore – that's stalker material. but really – i hope she finds a group of people who'll introduce her to real community and mutual love & respect. all of the comments (the ones that i supposed she's allowed) to that particular entry are in support/agreement, but no one offers hope.
rick,
Why should you be offended? She said pretty much that she's gonna delete anything that didnt support her. Yes the church is at fault because we (as a whole, always exceptions) dont lead people to Christ, we lead people to other people. We try to fix people, or pass them of on someone else that can fix them, etc… So we're seen as judgemental, etc. So what we've become is a religion without relationships. Her fault was that she was seeking something (in this case, religion) to make her feel positive about herself. She was raised Jewish, a religion that teaches rules and lacks relationship. The churches fault was failing to show her what a relationship with Christ was all about.
Again i ask, why should you be offended? She has chosen her current path, based on her emotional response to a situation. The fact is she's probably received and deleted many many more like what you tried to post. Do you honestly think that you could get through to her when others couldnt? Did you really have something that much better to say? She's made her decision and no one on the net is going to change her mind. The only thing that is going to change her mind is someone that takes the time to become her friend and become personal with her coupled with a divine intervention in their relationship.
Are you that person?
A noble intention none-the-less, and i too can read the post and my heart hurts for her. But sometimes intercession is really all thats needed. We're not here to save the world.